In oil & gas, when a plant is due for a turnaround, it means that production has to be stopped for a while and the plant goes through a major overhaul. All the equipment will be rejuvenated, the system revised and any damage will be repaired. The turnaround period is very crucial as it has to be done quickly and efficiently- every single minute lost of production results in losses of millions of ringgit or pounds or whatever currency. But once the turnaround is completed, the plant will work tremendously better than before and everyone's happy.
As for me, a turnaround is very much needed at the moment. Since Hubby left, I have piled on more weight than before, motivation is at its lowest and work has not been efficient. I haven't clock in a single overtime this month, which is a shame because the project is at its end phase and I might not be able to cash in some extra money anymore. But most of all, I am really disappointed with myself because I have left my work to record my development pending.
You see, I have always dreamed of becoming a Chartered Engineer. Heck, its the only one reason why I decided to leave Malaysia- my position in Petronas, my family and friends. I have sacrificed my comfort zone to start over as a graduate in the UK, so that I can have the opportunity to complete my Charteredship with KBR. As I looked back to where I was in Malaysia, I knew that I will never get the chance to do my Charteredship with the shitty support by the Malaysian bodies. Yes, I might be entitled to extra 'technical professional' allowance, or bonus or unlimited medical benefits- but I would just be a normal engineer, counting on my 'seniority' level to proceed. Its a vicious game to get on top in my previous company- you have to take everyone else down before you can climb up the ladder. A game I know that I will never survive.
Here its different. You can lick you boss's backside all you want but if you don't show any improvements in your work- you're doomed. You'll just be stuck at where you are. But if you work hard enough, your efforts will be appreciated and rewarded. To survive successfully, you have to do beter than what you're expected- no 'seniority' crap! If I work hard to become a Chartered Engineer, my current salary will triple and I can climb up the ladder twice as fast. Instead of having other people bringing you down, here they support you all the way.
However, it all has to start from myself- whether I want to do it or not. I confess that I have not been working hard enough lately. So I have decided to write this post to remind myself on what I left behind, what my goal was and what I need to do to catch up. I have to prove to myself and all the negative people out there (who brings me down by reminding me of all the "good" things I sacrificed) that I am here for a reason.
Adita, its time for a turnaround!
